PERSONAL SITE: VIVACIOUS!
Archive
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E-mail: erika@mirrorsoul.net
AIM: cezzy says (I prefer E-mail)

Recommendations
Book: The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand
Music: "No Such Thing" John Mayer
   "Catch the Sun" The Doves
   "Ivanka" Imperial Teen
   "Once Around the Block" Badly Drawn Boy
   "Big Star Machine" Superchic[k]
   "It's Oh So Quiet" Bjork
   "Photograph" Inspection12
   "Destiny" Zero 7
   "Hate to Say I Told You So" The Hives TV: Cowboy Bebop on Cartoon Network (don't know when it comes on anymore); Off Centre (9pm, Sundays on WB)
Internet: CULTURE SHoCK [e-zine]


Rhapsodic 101
     This little creation was whipped up by me, Erika. All entries, layouts, and graphics are original unless otherwise stated. In order to make this, I used Paint Shop Pro 7 The HTML was coded from scratch using Windows Notepad. I was looking through the thesaurus for a name and found rhapsodic (meaning a collection of sorts / miscellany).
     The picture of the pal tree is from FreeFoto.com, and the brush for the Asian-eyed chick was downloaded from Nocturna.net.

In order to view this site at its best, AOL users need to turn off their graphic compressors. You can do this by going to preferences, then internet options, then web graphics, then click 'never compress graphics.' It would then help if you deleted your temporary internet files and refreshed this page. ^_^


Links Out
Amy. Brandon. Brett. Genesis. Jen. Jess. Kahyen. Kris. Lara;2. Mel. Milo. Sarah. Sheila. Sylvia. Tim. Xeres


Linking Buttons
   

Etcetera
The only reason this thing is even up is because of Pitas.com. They rock. Oh, and the images are hosted at The Burgh Network. Thank you! :)

Spiderman was...okay, I guess. Though I wanted to tear my hair out by the second half of the movie because I got so bored. Sure, the effects were impressive and it was fairly funny at some parts, but the stuff in between the action sequences just dragged on... and on... and on... and on... Two hours was too long. Tobey Maguire was fine (the corniness suited the character), and I'm okay with Kirsten Dunst. It's just that... I don't know about anybody else, but I wanted to strangle Mary Jane's neck. (side note: That kiss did look fun though... Hmm... Gotta try it sometime ^_~)

I have a feeling that after my senior year, I'm going to be able to write one of those hilarious "awkward" teenage novels that we all love to read. I already have enough stories to fill a book. I just can't do it right now because I'm really bad at piecing everything together. I can write fiction, but when it comes to truth, it's hard for me to make everything come together in one continual story. Anyway, watch out for a novel by me someday. :) It won't be about me directly, but all of the things that have happened to me or I've actually done (note: first "deep" kiss... oh my god, I don't even want to think about it! *laughs hysterically* I still get teased, let's just say that) and all of the crazy characters I'm friends with will go into it. Just a random thought that came to mind while I was searching through Amazon for books to read (I may go to the library tomorrow).

No more school, mwuahahahahaha! ^_^

We had so much fun today though. The day was started off with Lichelle, Larry, and I having a water fight. We really had to avoid administrators though because all schools are really anal about water guns and anything that looks like a gun. Anyway, that's how we started. Then I did the thing that I've been planning for a while now (even though the plan didn't exactly work out). Roni gave me a condom and I was going to fill it up with hair gel, but I didn't have any, so we had to use water. So yeah, I was going to duct tape it to the wall, but Ethan (the king of duct tape) didn't have any! So we hooked it onto a locker and closed it so it was like... just hanging there. It looked funny. I had condom lube all over my hands and I wiped it on Allen's, Ethan's, and Brandon's faces. They didn't know what it was until they realized what I was doing... The reactions were priceless. ^_^

So I basically didn't go to any of my classes and got in sorta-trouble once with stupid hall-person-administrator-bitch. She took away my friend's yearbook just because I was signing it after she had "told" me to go to class three times already. I really don't like her.

And after school, me, Jessie, and Lichelle went home with Ethan because he lives over at the beaches. Today was a crappy day to go to the beach though, but it was still fun. We went to a pizza place and walked back home to Ethan's on the beach, but we didn't get in the water because the surf was really strong and the water would have been cold. But yeah... I want to live by the beach. Those houses are really nice.

So at Ethan's house, we just kind of chilled and sat down on the mattress on his floor and were laying all over each other (oh, it was me, Lichelle, Jessie, Ethan, Larry, Pam, Jeremy, and Erica). We sang songs and listened to Ethan play guitar. I wish I could just have people over like that. Mainly having members of the opposite sex come over, lol. Anyway... Pam's older sister, Trish, was the one who took me and Lichelle home, so we stopped by Starbuck's, got coffee, and then to Peterbrooke's, where I got my mom and aunt chocolate. We're all addicts. Then to their house for a while. I got home around 9; Lichelle stayed over until 9:45ish.

I'm really tired but the coffee got me all wired up.

Wahahaha... I totally blew like a hundred bucks of my birthday money today (I have $85 left, and there's apparently supposed to be more coming... Hey, I turned 16, okay? I'm not going to spend for a while though...). I got a pair of burgundy/maroon-ish pants, the Best of Blur CD set (2 of them! *hearts for eyes*), two posters (Van Goh + "Forever 27", which wasn't the one I wanted, but it's okay; I actually wanted a painting by Dali), and... the highlight of my afternoon... this shirt (in brown/red). I'm in fucking love. You don't understand... The minute I saw this on GirlShop, I wanted it. You can ask Lichelle. I actually sent her the link and told her that I wanted it. And then we're walking by this store at this really cool shopping strip downtown, and it was in the window, and trust me, I jumped right in and asked the guy where it was. LOL, it wasn't even out of the racks yet because he had just gotten them in that morning. ^_^ But yeah, I think Audrey Hepburn was great. She was just... I don't know. Charming, I suppose. I fall for every single one of her movies. I think there are only a couple now that I haven't seen yet... I know some of you are thinking I'm crazy, but well, I am.

TOMORROW IS THE LAST DAY.

Bio final tomorrow: talk about cramming. Ehhh... It turned out that I didn't start studying until... well an hour ago. That's pretty damn sad. I have to stop this whole procrastination thing by next year when I actually have AP exams to take. I wanna take a speed reading class. Maybe then I won't fall asleep after reading my shit about five times just to comprehend just one passage.

Episode II: Attack of the Clones, good. Hayden Chistensen, ooh la la. Positively smoldering. I could melt right on the spot. Cezzy has a new love interest. Natalie Portman has a nice stomach. I'll have something as such by August. 'Tis my goal.

Went shopping. Just a few summer pieces and such. Cute hat + cameo-ish necklace from Charlotte Russe.

Don't know why I'm not typing in complete sentences. Sue me.

Sorry images are screwed up. Will fix later.

Damn Florida weather; it's 60-something degrees out and it's almost June. :) Better not rain tomorrow.

Finals week. Kill me now and spare me the misery. I already failed my Algebra II final. Pulin tried to help, but to no avail. Still not comprehending; will be pulling hair out when I take calculus. Hoping I don't get kicked out of IB or something drastic. I'd cry. Gotta go start studying for biology.

FridayFive (so it's a day late... I never bothered to answer before because I was too lazy ^_^)

1. What shampoo do you use? As of now, Bath and Body Works' BIO (Deep Hydrating - the lavender bottle)

2. Do you use conditioner? What kind? Yes, same as above.

3. When was the last time you got your hair cut? Uh... April 23.

4. What styling products do you use? John Frieda's Frizz-Ease Wind-Down Relaxing Creme (my hair isn't curly, but it works nicely nonetheless because my hair is a weird texture between straight and wavy and gets even weirder when I blow-dry it without this stuff in it) and Secret Weapon Flawless Finishing Creme. Sometimes I use beachblonde Ocean Waves or Physique's Precision Pomade. I'm a hair product junkie. I love trying new stuff (when I can afford it, haha).

5. What's your worst hair-related experience? When I was seven, my mom made me get a haircut, and it was really short and it made me look like a boy. I went home with a hat on because I hated it.

I had a good day! I had a good day! I have awesome friends (woo, you guys kick ass)! Sooo Yasmeen gave me a giant balloon, Erica gave me flowers, Pulin gave me a bunch of stuff (a hilarious card, a keychain, a magnet that says "Save a tree. Eat a beaver.", and smartass pills), Jordan got me a set of three thongs (in beige, black, and white hahahahaha) and a card with a half naked guy with really nice abs on the front, Lichelle gave me a lunch + the giant banana, Larry wrote something for me + the giant banana, Sheila gave me candy, and Jolly got me a corsage.

And as if that wasn't enough... They pulled a surprise on me in the cafeteria. Pam made a cake and Larry brought pina colada. And I was like whoooaa, how the hell did you guys keep this from me?? Every single one of us is a blabbermouth! And yeah it was really cool. ^_^ Lichelle shoved cake in my face. Jaime put ice down my undies. And I love Erica, even though she couldn't be there.

Yeah, they're cool. ^_^ I love them all.

OOOH! My mom just turned on the radio! KICKASS! John Mayer is on! ^_^ I love the fact that actual GOOD music is being recognized by the pop stations. This is awesome.

I think I'm going to babysit in my neighborhood this summer. Would anybody care to tell me what the average rates are? :)

Yesterday was so much fun. We went to Busch Gardens in Tampa Bay, which is a good four hours away. So I pretty much slept on the way there, except for when Larry took off his shirt to change into a wifebeater that Lichelle and I forced him to wear the entire day by taking away his shirt. It was quite funny. :)

Busch Gardens is okay. I went on my first hanging rollercoaster. I was sort of disappointed... I like getting really scared in the beginning and being terrified throughout the entire ride, but it wasn't all that exciting. I will take sit-down rollercoasters any day because you get the zero gravity feeling from them whenever you drop. I love drops. ^_^

So yeah, I went aorund with Ethan, Lichelle, Dylan, Jessie, Larry, Erica, Pam, and another girl whose name I never remembered. Then we caught up with Mark, Andrew, and David for lunch. We ended up getting separated from Jessie, Ethan, and Dylan. And then when we tried to get into the little kiddie park (that place looks so fun), Lichelle and Larry got to slip by but the rest of us got caught, so we got separated from them. It was only me, Erica, Pam, Andrew, Mark, and David then. After walking around a while, we tried to get back into the park, and we did, only to get kicked out eventually (I pretended to be looking for my little sister, "Anna Marie Chavez" lol). We lost Erica and Mark in the kiddy place.

Then I just walked around with Pam, the other girl, David, and Andrew. We had fun just talking and watching people though.

Lichelle and Larry won me a giant stuffed banana. LOL, that's an inside joke. ^_^ There's just something about bananas that are just hilarious to me, and whenever someone around us starts eating one, everybody just kind of turns around and waits for me to start cracking up hysterically.

The bus ride home was fun as anything though! Larry took off his wet wifebeater (he had just gotten off River Rapids), and Jessie took it and rubbed it all over my face when I wasn't watching. And Lichelle started laughing at me so I took it ad got it all over her face, and we just had a fight over that, which eventually led to a pillow/tickle fight between me, Lichelle, and Larry and Lichelle getting stuck under the bus seat, lol. Dylan took my giant banana and rode it (okay, dirty sentence, I know). Then we started playing dare, and it began pretty mildly, and ended up with... Yeah, here are some of the things we did:

- Lichelle had to make out with the window.
- SpanishLarry had to lick David's ear (which was completely funny because David didn't know what was going on and the reaction on his face was such a Kodak moment).
- David had to give me a lapdance.
- Larry had to do a strip TEASE in the middle of the aisle, which was funny just because it was Larry.
- Erica had to lick Larry's nipple (she was moving into it slowly, and I pushed her head into it, lol).
- I had to nibble on Tyler's ear lobe.
- Pam had to hump the seat.
- Lichelle had to bite Mark's lower lip.
- David had to pull his shorts down to his knees.
- I had to lick SpanishLarry's finger (I left my gum on his fingernail, lol).
- Erica had to dangle a tampon in front of an unsuspecting boy and ask him if he knew what it was and what it was used for.
- Larry had to walk to the back of the bus towards the bathroom with my lotion in hand and ask Jeremy if he had a magazine he could use (Steven took my lotion, poured some into a cup, yelled out "Fake vagina!" and start doing dirty things with it).
- And Ethan had to rub up on the seat, which he completely took advantage of and did something none of us really suspected...
- Spanish Larry had to put on Lichelle's bikini top. He did more than we intended though when he called out Steven's name and asked him if we had any Spanish homework. [conversation: Larry: Hey, Steven, did we have any language homework? Steven: What...? Larry: Did we have any language homework? Steven: Larry... (Steven walks over) There's only one thing I want to do right now (Then he grabs Larry's chest)]

Yeah, we are quite a crazy bunch.

I love May. Fieldtrips, end-of-the-year stuff, school ending, nice weather, my birthday... It's just a good month. :)

I made a buddy icon last night of me, and Pulin thought that it was scary, lol... Today, while I was talking to him, I sent it to him at a random time again...

Erika:
Erika: mwuahahahahahahahaha
Pulin: DONT SCARE ME LIKE THAT!!!!!!!
Pulin: AAAAGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!
Erika: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!

I actually only use the picture on the left as my icon.

I don't know why I never took the time to link Jess before, but I am now. :) Click on her link to "Motivational Money." I'm actually one of the dorks who do that. I didn't know it was illegal to write on money until last year, lol, but I still do every now and then. I like writing, "Money can't buy you happiness", little quotes, short verses, lyrics, etc.

Anyway, my grandparents came over today. They're a couple of hilarious people. I popped in the Snow White DVD (they wanted to see how the big screen TV works), and my grandma sat there watching it for a good half hour, laughing and singing along. ^_^

Today was a pretty good day... :) We didn't have to do anything in 2nd period since we went to this play thing. And then PE is just like... my chill period. For real. I find shade somewhere and sit. And if my coach bugs me about not doing anything I just playfully argue right back at him and he usually just walks away, shaking his head. I hope he doesn't decide to give me a B for being such a smartass all the time.

Then in lunch, hahahaha... I was walking around with Pulin and Jerry decides that he wanted to get me wet so he took his water bottle and splashed it at my crotch so I looked like a pissed on myself, so I started chasing him around the courtyard but I was wearing lowriders and a rather "honest" shirt today so I couldn't exactly run... And then Larry comes up with a water pistol and squirts me in the face, so I took my water bottle and splashed him with water. ^_^ My face was soaked and I had wet spots on my shirt... But the back of Larry's shirt was WET. =D

I was completely restless in 4th period though. I just wanted the day to end. It was Friday and I wanted to go home and just sit around and not have to worry about whether or not I'm understanding anything that my biology teacher is talking about. I mean, everything that she talked about today just went *whoosh* right over my head. I just kind of sat there entertaining myself with little drawings and the music that kept on going in my head.

We went to the mall after school, but the only thing I got was a new purse that was on sale for $15 (it's really cute though). My mom wants to take me back so I can actually get stuff without my stepdad and my little brother around being all impatient. :) We're trying to look for a nice turquoise necklace with a big pendant sort of thing.

School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over... School is almost over...

I didn't go to school two days in a row. I'm so screwed in biology... I missed a lab and a quiz. Way to start a new quarter, eh? I so don't want to go back to school for the rest of the year. 23 more days (including weekends).

On the other hand... I will be 16 in two weeks. :) Absolutely amazing how time goes by so quickly.

Songs that make me wish I had a convertible so I could roll the top down and sing to them and take a joy ride with (awkward sentence, I know):

"Sugar" by Stretch Princess
"That Thing You Do" by The Wonders (from That Thing You Do!)
"Big Star Machine" by Superchic[k]
"San Dimas High School Football Rules" by the Ataris
"Love Me Do" by the Beatles
"St. Elmo's Fire" by Inspection 12
"One Girl Revolution" by Superchic[k]
"99 Red Balloons" by Blondie
"I Want You to Want Me" Letters to Cleo version
"Just A Girl" by No Doubt
"I Know" by Save Ferris

I can't wait til summer. =D

I got a haircut. Yet again. Third one this year; I've never had so many within one year, lol (I usually just let everything grow out and get one 3-5 inch cut over the summer). And it's only four months into it, too. But, hey, I like change. A lot of people were shocked. I don't blame them, it is pretty short (shorter than I thought it would be, but it's a nice cut nonetheless). Just past my ears, layers, bangs... Jessie said I looked like a pixie.

I'm bored. :/ I already went through all the houses that are in the process of getting built on our cul-de-sac, there isn't anything interesting to do outside, we don't have cable yet, and I don't want to do my homework yet. Gahhh.

My connection is fast. ^_^ Thank you, BellSouth.

I absolutely love our new house! ^_^ Yesterday was such a long day though... Woke up at 8 and started packing some more, putting crap away, etc, etc. The movers came around 9, and we finished moving OUT around 11. Then we drove to our new house and finished moving IN around 1. We got things done pretty quickly, actually. My stepdad's parents came with pizza, drinks, apples, and cookies so we ate. We kept on working at getting stuff out of boxes until around 6, when my brother and I left with my step-grandparents to go to their house and swim in the pool. Then my parents came and we had dinner though. :) We're not completely unpacked though, and my parents are in the process of getting me new stuff for my bedroom.

Uh huh. I can hear the echoes of my keyboard, and there's still that new-house-smell lingering around (I love that). Oh, and my computer's in the kitchen, lol. It's cool though because the kitchen is HUGE and even with the breakfast nook and my computer here, there's still room to stick a sofa and a coffee table at the other end. Happiness. ^_^

You so don't realize how much shit you have in your bedroom until you have to pack it all up and realize that you've filled more than 8 trashbags in the course of one week. I'm tired.

I got really bored in 4th period, so I asked people for gum wrappers and I made a gum wrapper chain. I'm going to keep going at it until the end of the year, which is suprisingly not that far away. :)

IT'S SO HOT IN FLORIDA (and it's not even May yet)!!

Oooh, awesome test week. I made a 92% on my bio test (my first A on a bio test in a verryyy long time!), a 94% on my algebra test, and a 92% on a test in PE (it's actually a half written, half physical course; highest grade in the class). Kickass.

I went to this after school basketball tournament thing (friends were playing; they called themselves the Asian Invasion and wanted me to play, but no 'cause I suck). I guess it was fun, lol. I didn't really watch the games, I was just there to chill.

Last three days of school are supposed to be halfdays (May 21-23). Beach! ^_^ That would be so awesome because on the 21st and the 22nd, we have two finals to take, but then we get out at 12:30. Yay! I can't wait until summer comes along.

Okay, so last year I learned "It's the End of the World as We Know It" by REM. This year, I'm going to learn "Ca Plane Pour Moi" by Plastic Bertrand. And it's in French. And I have no French tongue (haha) whatsoever. And it's pretty fast. Hey, I have to keep myself amused somehow.

Erika's a loser. I've been watching ABC family while I packed all day. ^_^ So Little Time is just... addicting as fuck. It makes me feel all summery and stuff because that was one of my summer shows. I think the only reason I like it so much is because of the clothes. So yeah, what are my plans for tonight? If I don't go out somewhere, I'm going to watch Winning London, lol. Hey, that guy is mighty cute! Not to mention he has an Australian accent (*swoons for British/Aussie accents*)...

I'm for real hooked on Superchic[k] right now. I just love singing to their songs. I wish I had some sort of musical talent and be in a band or something. That would be really kickass. Oh well. LOL, my friend asked me to be his band's manager. I laughed. ^_^ I don't know, maybe I'd say yes if they were to ask me again. It would be easy money getting them gigs and promoting and stuff. It just seems ridiculous for them to have a manager to me.

Wow, I haven't been here for a while. It's not that I never had anything to write about (trust me, there were things to write about), I just never did. =D

First and foremost: I hate humidity. Specifically, Florida humidity. It's all gross and hot and I can feel particles from the air sticking to my skin and my hair goes absolutely crazy and everything is just damp.

I'm moving in a week. :)

I'm bad at making smooth transitions in my entries, lol.

Okay, so now that we're discussing The Old Man and the Sea in English class, I'm actually really loving the book (so sue me). It was a bitch to read, probably just because I couldn't do it at my leisure, but I'm having fun just having discussions in class, even though I'm not the world's most articulate person because my brain works a lot faster than my tongue and I mix everything up.

OH! Last night, I was watching Dark Angel and the preview for the next That 70's Show! came on, and they asked MY question! "If Canadians call ham bacon, what the hell do they call bacon?" LOL, while we were on the bus on the way to Washington DC last year, me and Lichelle were the first ones who woke up and we were pretty dazed from not getting enough sleep (we all played spades and BS with my former science teacher that night), and we just started talking about stuff, and that came up. And people said that they woke up to her and me giggling and contemplating Canadian names. So yeah. ^_^ I miss Washington DC. That was an awesome trip.

Everytime my friend Larry starts annoying me or something, I start talking about how the menstrual cycle works and he stops, lol. At the pace we're going, he'll know everything there is to know about menstruation by the time the school year is over. ^_^

I'm at home, sick. Last night I was puking every couple of hours or so. Not nice. :( I think I got dehydrated, too... My lips are so parched. At least my mom made me lugaw (Filipino dish; kind of like soupy rice). I love that stuff. ^_^

I want vintage posters.

Gaahhhh...! Is it just me, or does Delia's just keep getting better and better lately??

Oh, I found out what I'm sick with. :( Some kind of stomach virus. I broke six years of not vomiting this morning. I haven't done it since I was nine. It was gross. I hate throwing up. The worst part is there's no medicine I can take.

I've slept a whole lot this entire week. I'd go home after school and sleep. Wake up, eat, shower, sleep. Then I'd get on the bus in the morning on the way to school and sleep, and that's like 45 minutes right there. :)

I finally got something I needed to get over with over with today. Yeaaahhh... =D And that's all you gotta know.

I'm craving some rice.

I hate my stomach and the back of my head right about now.

I feel really crappy. Everytime I stand up I black out and have to sit back down and my stomach feels like it's eating itself up and my head is friggin' pulsing. :( And it was a bad day. Very bad day. I didn't like it.

Haven't checked my e-mail in ages...

The Oscars so far is absolutely great. ^_^ I LOVED, LOVED, LOVED Woody Allen's little bit and the short ditty about New York that went with it. =D And they used Rhapsody in Blue! That's like my favorite piece by George Gershwin, and trust me, I love a lot of his music. And it had Liza Minelli singing New York, New York! And a whole bunch of my favorite movies! I was in bliss. ^_^

Me, Lichelle, Jessica.

I like how I curled my hair today. I went over to Lichelle's house and we goofed around with the webcam for a good hour or so, lol. We took some really great pictures. Then Jessica had to leave so Lichelle and I went to the mall where I spent the last of the money I just got on a $13 skirt at Old Navy. :/ I need to stop making myself broke.

Shiiiiiiit... I just got back from a show about a half hour ago. Four bands played, but we only stayed for the opening three, and the best (and the one I went for) being Soapbox7, formerly known as Negative 121. There were two bands that played before them, but they kind of sucked. Okay, not kind of, like for real sucked. I wasn't exactly in a punk show mood though and the chai that I drank didn't exactly kick in and I had cramps and I was without Aleve. LOL, I went into the bathroom and just laid down weird on a chair (I guess I looked drunk or something) and this chick comes up to me and asked me if I was alright. It was still fun though.

We (Jessica, Lichelle, Lichelle's older brother who is TWENTY-THREE, and me) were marked because we were under 21 (Lichelle's brother didn't have his ID), but I went to go see if the so-called permanent marker could wash off, and it did, haha. It was really funny because people were trying to start a mosh pit and it didn't exactly work, lol. I mean, the place wasn't exactly packed.

Anyhoo, guess who else was here tonight... I Am the World Trade Center. Yeah, I'm sad I missed that.

I'm tired.

Hey hey, new layout. :) Sorry if the scrollbar looks like shit. I'm in the process of downloading Explorer 6 on Lichelle's computer (I'm at her house), so I can't see how it looks. Anyway, yeah.

Okiiiieeee, yesterday was fun. =D Went a-beachin' and a-shoppin'! Got my tan evened out a little bit, bought two new pairs of jeans (buy one, get one free at PacSun, haha), and a new bathing suit from the $19.99 rack at Core. LOL, basically, I went and made myself broke. For real. I have ONE dollar and a small number of change in my wallet right now. And I don't get allowance this week either. :/ It was still fun though. We're going to try and go to the beach again tomorrow. It feels like summer vacation. :)

I think I'll actually TRY and get a job this summer. I could have actually gotten my driver's license in May too, but I'm a lazyass who waited until November to get my permit so I have to wait a year. =D Advice for those of you who are supposed to have your permits but don't have them yet: GET IT!!

This thing really needs a new layout.